We’re the personification of irony, all of us
We’re afraid of being alone, and yet whenever we’re faced with a problem,
or simply overwhelmed,
We’re too proud to say we’re not okay
Instead, our first instinct is to hide,
Because we want to deal with it on our own
Beause we simply refuse to believe that anyone could actually help
Because we don’t want anyone to see that speck of vulnerability in us
Our fences of insecurity and self defences have become giant impenetrable walls
We cannot think, cannot see through it
Or probably just won’t
With a variety of excuses in our arsenal
Ready to shoot down any rational arguement that tries to break through
Because taking a leap of faith has broken us instead at some point in life
But what we don’t get is that it’s not the decision of letting in that was wrong as much as the person we actually let in
That we failed to notice the ones who not only could but actually did have our backs
And thus we let the ripple effects of our mistakes hold us back further
Because we want people to beleive in us without the heart to let go of our fears
You stood there waiting for him, nervousness filling you up with each passing second. It was the same park where you both first met. You remenisce on the wonderful memories you’d created walking through the same roads, the times you pretended to be cold so that he would wrap you up in his jacket! The many coffee dates he took you on inspite of being more of a tea person himself. The way you’d squeeze his hand tight and give him a comforting smile, to reassure him. You lowkey loved how he was extremely protective and possessive about you but would never admit.
But he wasnt there today, you know he’s gone
You crave his scent , his warm hands around you! You always kept pushing him, like others, to see if he would come back, if he cared enough to fight for you. And everytime that he did, your feelings and trust in him grew a little stronger. Each time,he’d hold and comfort you, and tell you he loved you. But it somehow was never enough for you and you’d push him back farther each time. Well, guess what! This time you finally pushed him so far away, that he couldnt find his way back. All thats left for you to do is stand there waiting for him, hoping for your love to guide him back to you!
Your voice is my favourite music
The kind I’d love to listen to all day!
Your eyes my favourite illusion, in them
I’d love to get lost in every way!
Your scent feels just like home
The kind I never wanna stay away from, honestly, never!
Your shoulders more relaxing than any bed
Time stops and all my worries disappear and for once, it feels like forever!
Your hugs , the way you so deftly scoop me up in your strong arms
They’re the cocoons I keep coming back to even after breking free!
Your smile, the heavenly blend of innocence and tease
Knowing that I’m the reason for it, sends my heart on a happy spree!
How could you be dumb enough
To beleive him when he said you were special,
that there existed between you a common denominator
To forget all those times he ignored your calls and texts just because he was “sorry” later
How could you be so blind
To look past all his wrongs just because deep down you wanted him to be your “right”
To tolerate patiently all his mood swings for you fall all over again at his mere sight
How could you not realise,
The strings that you thought were attatched strongly had infact many loose ends
“The one” for him you werent, for you, none of his rules he’d ever bend
How could you be so reckless
To give up on your friends who meant the world to you to fit in his tiny dingy heart
To keep hiding all those scars he so obliviously gave
For the fear of everything falling apart…..
This damn world as they say, is not a bed of roses
And not everytime does a window open, when all doors it closes
You think its just you?
No honey its something everyone goes through
If you think karma is the only kinky bitch that loves to fuck you up,
You’ll soon learn just how oblivious you were,
When life decides to catch up!!!
I know its been a really long while but I wanted to let you know
I told you I loved you, not just to hear you say it back to me
But because I meant it , I still do
I dont care if we havent been in touch lately,
I dont care if all you want to do is rant about something stupid in life
I dont care if its 3 in the morning and you think I’m probably asleep
Just know, that I’m gonna be there, always!
Because that is what love means to me,
That.. is what you mean to me!
Cut yourself a little slack
You know you’ve been through a lot,
The barriers you thought you’d never get through
The set backs you didnt think you could move on from
The test you thought you wouldnt ever be able to pass in
The obdurate pimple you feared would grace your face forever
That embarassing incident in high school, the churlish classmates and their laughter echoing in your ears
Left you crestfallen, wanting to disappear
Didnt it make you beleive your life was fucking messed up and couldnt be worse?
Now take a long moment and think of all those times and situations again
Yes you’ve made it out alive
And you’re gonna keep doing so
You may not pass everytime with flying colours
But you’ll always learn something new, experience something unique
And life will make a little more sense each day!
Continue reading “Cut yourself a little slack !”