A letter to myself

I want to write a letter

To the five year old me

Whose smile was brighter than sun that shined

With rosy cheeks and eyes too kind

Who knew perfectly well how to throw tantrums and fits

And such a devilish sense of humour, with none that could match her wits

Hoping to find the key to happiness she had

That let her be hopeful, even in situations that bad


I want to write a letter

To the ten year old me

Who loved everything around her selflessly and was instantly liked by all

Who was reckless and had not a care in the world as she knew no one would let her fall

Hoping to get back some of the confidence, fierceness and charm in her

That seems to have kept fading away, day by day, year by year


I want to write a letter

To the fifteen year old me

Who knew she wasn’t born to be confined in that small town that kept her tied

Who was so determined to spread out her wings and fly, that she couldn’t help and lied

Not just to her parents but also to herself, that everytime would be the last

And now their disappointed faces and the guilt have become the ghosts that haunt her past

Hoping to remind her how dearly she was loved and that she only had to ask

For help, for support, even a shoulder to cry on instead of hiding behind that mask


I want to write a letter

To the 20 year old me

Who will probably have began working a corporate job

Or figured out the hoax and with no way out be digging into the pillow to cover her sob

Hoping that I can provide her with a few words of comfort on such stormy nights

And remind her of the girl she was, of how bravely she fought all her fights

And despite everyone trying to tame her down, she stuck up for herself, for her dreams

Right or not, winning or not, she’ll always be the one constant player on her team!

She sells her body

Her glistening eyes that once were a calm ocean now behold a burning rage

Cover your legs they said, no crop tops they said, it’s not the right age

She ditched the stilletos for they were provocative they said

But that didnt prevent it from happening, nor did the saffron on her head

Neither the concrete structure she’d go for praying with flowers and her soul to offer

Nor did the society she desperately tried to fit in tried to take the pain off her

Her cries for help were answered by pretentious display of sympathy

But they soon dried up , along with the expectations of their empathy

It’s strange how she was left alone to fight her battles by herself

And now since she finally stopped trying and decided to give in to her fate

She sells her body they say

Got no morals, just a will and a way

She aint fit to live in our society they diss

Holding her guilty for enjoying such bliss ….

I MISS HIM…..

I miss him

Even though he is right in front of me

Laughing and talking with our friends

I wanna walk straight up to him ask him how his day was and whatever else I manage to blurt about

I start to call out for him but words refuse to escape my mouth

And so I scurry back away, making a complete fool of myself all over again

I miss him

Even though I’ve continuously been reading our conversations,

Trying to find out some loophole, something that I might’ve missed the first time

Or the hundredth time

But they give me the same butterflies, the same confusion, the same pain again

And I end up in a blurry wave of emotions with no proper conclusion all over again

I miss him

Even though his picture is painted oh so vividly in my eyes

I still yearn to see him, every chance I can

To fuel the fire burning in me, burning me up

Wondering if he’d ever feel any of it

If I’ll ever be able to tell him any of it,

But mostly, if it’ll make any difference to him,

And I’m going round and round in those same circles in my mind, all over again!

Its How You Lost The Guy!


You stood there waiting for him, nervousness filling you up with each passing second. It was the same park where you both first met. You remenisce on the wonderful memories you’d created walking through the same roads, the times you pretended to be cold so that he would wrap you up in his jacket! The many coffee dates he took you on inspite of being more of a tea person himself. The way you’d squeeze his hand tight and give him a comforting smile, to reassure him. You lowkey loved how he was extremely protective and possessive about you but would never admit.

But he wasnt there today, you know he’s gone

You crave his scent , his warm hands around you! You always kept pushing him, like others, to see if he would come back, if he cared enough to fight for you. And everytime that he did, your feelings and trust in him grew a little stronger. Each time,he’d hold and comfort you, and tell you he loved you. But it somehow was never enough for you and you’d push him back farther each time. Well, guess what! This time you finally pushed him so far away, that he couldnt find his way back. All thats left for you to do is stand there waiting for him, hoping for your love to guide him back to you!

HE’S THE ONE !

If he listens to you rant on and on about how your eyeliners dont match,he’s the one!
But if he tells you to stop being a whiny little kid and probably just do them again, he’s the one!

If he knows when you’re feeling off, and how to cheer you up, he’s the one!
If he patiently waits for you to tell him about it, when you’re willing, he’s the one!

If he wraps you up in big bear hugs and is up for cuddling whenever you need, he’s the one!
But if he likes to have his own space and also respects yours, he’s the one!

If he orders you an extra cheesy pizza when all you ask for is a salad, he’s the one!
If he cockily snatches away fries from your plate when you arent looking, he’s the one!

If he loves to hold your hand and keep you close and proudly show you off, he’s the one!
But if he’d rather have you all for himself than sharing your divine moments, he’s the one!

If he passionately hypes you up inspite of your twisted raunchy humour, he’s the one!
But if he calls you out on your bullshit and then revels in watching the angry pout on your face, he’s the one!

If he remembers random little details about things you say, your likes and dislikes , he’s the one!
Even if he forgets your birthday or when you first met , but makes every day seem just as special, he’s definitely the one !!!